Why Emotionally Focused Therapy?
Many couples consider and ponder over whether couples counseling could help their relationship.
They may ask their friends if they went to couples counseling and if it helped them. Or maybe they did some research online to see if they can find a therapist that they like. Some do all of this work but still do not take action to make one of THE MOST important calls to schedule an appointment with a couples’ therapist.
What holds them back?
Many reasons will stop a couple from taking action like they are not sure how counseling can help them. They are afraid of what can actually happen in a session. Talking about their challenges may make things worse, or maybe they don’t think their partner will want to come to therapy. There are several more reasons why couples don’t take that leap and get help for their relationship. Perhaps if they knew the real benefits of couples counseling, they would run rather than walk to therapy if they knew that there was an approach of couples therapy that really works.
There is good news – there IS and this approach is called Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy – also known as EFT.
It has been proven in research to be very effective. It is about strengthening your connection with your partner, and showing you how you can turn toward your partner and feel close again.
Here are 5 reasons why you should choose an EFT therapist:
- EFT Therapy provides a safe space for you talk about the moments that get you stuck.
In counseling, you have your own time and place to talk about those difficult moments that keep you from connecting. It is also safe because you have a therapist guiding you as you talk about these moments.
- You will talk about what is getting, and keeping, you stuck in a different way.
When you are on your own at home, you may feel like you both get stuck. It feels like resolving issues are impossible. You continue to get caught in a negative pattern that happens over and over. It can feel pointless and hopeless. Your therapist will help you understand that negative dance and what is happening in those fights at home.
- You will understand what you do when you get hurt and how your partner feels in those moments.
This gives you a new understanding of your partner and yourself. You may get angry but really underneath you may feel hurt, sad and alone. This happens when your partner shuts you out or when you shut down. On the same token, your partner may also hurt in those times when you are fighting. But you may only see the anger and not the hurt. In EFT sessions, your therapist will help you get to the hurt. then you are able to talk to each other about it resulting in resolve and growth in your relationship.
- By knowing the cycle or negative dance that you get caught in helps you to learn how to step out of it.
This means you will be able to prevent those huge fights. When you will see and know the pattern is, you then see the problem. You will be able to stop it and step out of it. Understanding the cycle is the problem, and getting caught in it is an important step. When you are able to do this, you can stop the conflict dead in its tracks!
- When you can reconnect and get close again, then you can resolve any issue together.
You won’t need to be in therapy forever. Once you have deescalated the conflict you can understand each other better. Then you will feel closer and reconnected. When this connection is strengthened, then you will turn toward your partner in good times and in bad times.
Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy is a powerful approach and has been proven to be 70% effective in making long-lasting changes in relationships.
- Create safety in your relationship
- Have a therapist who will guide you to talk about your hurt and those tough moments in a new way.
- Understand your negative dance, what you both do in those moments when you hurt each other and turn away from each other.
- Learn how this feels for yourself and your partner.
- Reconnect and get close again so you can have more love, more peace, and more joy in your relationship again!
If you are struggling in your relationship and are ready to take action and get your appointment scheduled with an EFT Therapist, Please do not hesitate to call at 561-203-9280 or send an email here.