The new year has begun and most people start the year by making resolutions or setting new goals. Most of the time, we focus on ourselves.
What is the number one personal resolution that most people make?
Perhaps you have made the resolution yourself this year to get healthy, lose weight, be more fit. That is a common resolution for most of us. Another common goal is regarding work. Work smarter, not harder or to make more money than you did last year.
What resolutions did you make for 2019?
- Did any of your resolutions include relationship goals?
- How do you want to improve your relationship this year?
- Did you and your partner talk about that?
It is important to review how you both feel in your connection, your lifestyle, your financial goals. There is a lot to go over together. Take some time to talk and make a plan for 2019 and how you are going to make your relationship better this year.
So, why not introduce this into your love life?
No matter what stage you are at in your relationship, you can identify achievable resolutions for a happier, more fulfilling partnership.
The following goals for 2019 can be resolutions that you and your mate plan together.
- How is your emotional connection?
This means how connected are you to your partner emotionally.
Do you feel your partner is responsive to your needs?
Is your partner there for you when you need him/her?
When you do share how you feel, do you feel heard, validated and understood?
Does your partner feel you do this for them?
Be open and honest here. Talk about the positive things first and then say what you would like to work together.
For example, I like when we talk together about work or the kids, but I would like us to talk more about our feelings.
- What are your dreams for 2019?
Hear what your partner has to say about what is on the bucket list for this year. Maybe you want to travel to Europe or run a marathon. Tell each other your dreams and write them down.
- Financial goals:
Discussing finances is not romantic but it is important and is the new year is a great time to do so.
What do you hope to accomplish financially this year?
Do you want to make a plan to save more money?
Do you want to pay off that credit card debt?
- Fun goals:
Yes, this is a great time to talk about how you can add more fun to your relationship.
Do you go out on enough date nights?
How can you add more fun?
Think about what you both like to do when you’re together.
Go to more concerts, movies, mini golf, or out dancing together.
- Learn something new together:
This is a great way to get closer by stepping out of your comfort zones together! Is there is something new you both have been interested in trying?
Consider signing up for a class
Trying a new sport
This could range from taking a dance class to learning a foreign language together.
So, even though the new year has begun, there is still time to have these conversations with your mate. It sets a positive tone for your relationship and helps out you both on the same page. Some topics might be harder than others but you can start with the easy ones first like the fun goals. Then move to a harder one like financial goals.
Remember the goal here is to improve from this point together. It is not about rehashing problems or criticizing each other. But, it is a time for you both to reflect on your relationship and make a plan to make it even stronger!
If you find that you and your partner are having a hard time with this, couples counseling can help you both work through this together. Please call me at 561-203-9280 or send a message here to schedule an appointment.