All marriages go through ups and downs, especially in long-term marriages. I think it is safe to say that no couple goes through marriage thinking about getting a divorce. Yet, the divorce rate is very high, nearly 60% of married couples end up getting divorced. Yes, that is right! There are warning signs way before a couple gets to that breaking point.
Serious marriage problems don’t happen overnight. They build over time and get worse. The reason that the divorce rate is so high is that most couples don’t get help. They just leave the marriage. And, the ones that do get help, sometimes wait as long as six to seven years to go to marriage counseling and sometimes, that is a little too late. As a marriage counselor, this is very sad to me because so many marriages could be saved if they got help in time.
Here are some red flags that your marriage is in trouble.
- You have the same fight over and over.
All couples have a negative pattern of communication. Whatever the fight is about, this same pattern happens and it becomes worse over time. One partner usually pushes for communication while the other pulls away. When this fight happens, you end up feeling disconnected from your spouse, sad, and alone.
- You don’t talk at all.
Or the opposite could be happening in your marriage. Perhaps you feel like you are living with your roommate instead of your spouse. You talk only about the logistics of the day, or what to have for dinner but you don’t have any real, meaningful communication. It can be very frustrating and can make you feel like you are alone in your marriage.
- Little or no sex.
Maybe you can’t remember the last time you had sex with your partner. Or you avoid intimacy at all costs. Sex is very important and should be a healthy part of any marriage. When the emotional connection is missing, it is hard to want to be intimate with your mate.
- Spending less time together.
You used to go out on dates and have fun together but that has stopped. Maybe you are overly focused on the kids and their busy schedules and stopped making time for the two of you a priority. This also affects your emotional connection with your spouse and over time you can feel like you don’t know your partner anymore.
- You are thinking about having an affair.
This is perhaps the most dangerous sign. If you are daydreaming about having an affair, this is not a good sign. This means you are feeling lonely, emotionally disconnected, and unloved.
Do you notice any of these signs in your marriage? It is crucial that you seek help now. As an experienced marriage counselor, I can tell you that you don’t have to go through this alone. It is possible to rebuild your emotional connection with your spouse and be stronger than ever.
Marriage counseling in Boca Raton at the Heart Connection Center can help you rekindle the love that brought you together in the first place. I am passionate about helping couples save their relationships! I am trained in a model of couples therapy called Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy which has a proven success rate of 75% of couples making long-lasting changes! I am certified in EFT and have helped countless couples prevent divorce and be happy again together.
You don’t need to suffer any longer! You have come to the right place and I would be honored to help you and your spouse get unstuck and find the happiness and love you deserve.
Don’t hesitate to call me at 561-203-9280!